If one knows truth, one has the obligation to spread truth.

This is to the question of why hide the truth if you already know it? Why remain silent?

As a person who realized that there is a clear friction between his will and the will of others, however partial or illusiory, he will find the need to be discreet in presence of this other will that may very well purge him. The need to be somewhat invisible in the face of adversary becomes a necessity. A person that tries to transmit truth via a sermon or a demonstration might not work if the nature of that 'truth' is beyond words and demonstration. Sometimes a person might know truth but decides to not be vocal about it simply because it cannot be perceived from an incomplete point of view. I invite the reader to be more open as to the method of transmission itself can be beyond measure of our current perception.

A person who is confused turns around and tries to find help from others, his parents, friends,his psychiatrist. Turns around to 'God' via praying and meditation but continually finds nothing. Why is this? He asks. I've been tossed and turned by the people around me, including 'God' but I still feel that everything is wrong about me. Throughout his journey he didn't find any salvation from the outside, he decides to go 'in' to the dark areas unexplored. Uncharted by the books, unseen by others, unspoken by his upbringers and teachers and society. There he sees that there might be hope. He hasn't put things in stone yet, but he ventures anyway.

But his journey will not be approved by the people around him, he will be branded a heretic, blasphemous, satanist, all the bad names society can offer. His parents will disown him, his friends will leave him and he will be an outcast to society. The nature of his undertaking is simply bizarre! This he considers beforehand, and it is only then it becomes apparent that he must be discreet.

The world is a fairly complicated place. I do not agree that once you know something it becomes an overbearing mission to give it out to the world. Or rather, it's more tricky than most would like to put it across. Only an idiot would say that more money means a better life. A more reasonable man would say a reasonable amount of money would be enough to lead a better life. An idiot would say that if you know truth, then show it to us. A reasonable person would demand a reasonable explanation. But we all know that we do not need to justify our sight to a blind man. The blind man must be able to see first to understand!

This we usually miss. A lot of time. It's a real wonder why words of wisdom will only enlighten us to the most obvious of things and yet we have *this* as a world we live in today.

People are easily hurt. And why it's complicated to simply lunge a stake signed truth into their heart is because when people are hurt they retaliate, and truth will not sink. How can we tell to them we don't need this internet, this smartphones, this cars, this house and this.. 'system' in order to live a perfectly healthy and happy life? when people make such a big deal when it comes to politics, economy and technology moving forward? They're even doing it at the cost of destroying their very planet, if not their own self!

Methods like words and actions are a very partial tool, they cannot transmit truth well enough it will pierce through a person eventhough how much they'd want to deny it. But from a certain perspective, it is awfully cruel to enlight truth to an unwilling, not ready person right?

That's why it pays to be discreet toward certain extent. I believe that the nature of a certain kind of communication means it requires a great deal of 'molding', or 'growth', even 'readiness' before it can take stage. From the times of Copernicus to Galileo the church would kill in order to hide the 'truth'. I believe that it's not so different nowadays anyways.... Who knows how many things, that effects our very life and death, our very conviction, our very belief and ... everything about what we define as 'us', is concealed from our knowing?(hint:Zeitgeist Addendum) The prospect of how, maybe if these truths are brought to light in our readiness might very well make us transcend is definitely worth considering.

God does not simply shut a light bulb from His toilet seat.

What if I was born in a bad place? What if I was born without the ability to reason. That for some reason I'm wired differently and I can't fit into society. What if I was born in a place of war? I would have no opportunity to write in this blog simply because I was constantly worried about survival. Maybe I was born without a competent parent to supply my needs for grow. Maybe in a society that's too conservative or a society that's too liberal. Point is what's the point of asking for a perfect origin?

It's not that life is not perfect, but it's the illusion of perfection that needs to be reconsidered. Why is it considered perfect to have a perfect score in exams? Why is it considered an excellence to win at sports and why is it that earning 5 digits at work is considered secured? Why do we keep gauging people at what they do? Why, when someone expressses their guilt or depression we automatically assume that they're at a worse place than us? Why do we keep ridiculing people's stupidity when they fail to reason in the way
society do? In perfection that they create, it becomes impossible to comply. When we consider God as an archetype of perfection we automatically put our own standard of perfection unto Him. What an idiotic approach.

I think it's evil when we judge people based on origin. Along the way we deny their chance of change. An introvert cannot become an extrovert. A person who can't draw was considered as having no talent. The poor gets poorer the richer gets richer. It's too one sided. It's evil in every sense.

I think it's important to keep the options open. I mean, really open. It's important to keep an open ear when the person I see as stupid and consider every word he says and take it seriously. It's important to keep an open mind when the person you love or respect say something, and take a bold step to doubt it. More importantly, it's important to not simply take answers as absolute. If an answer stop the questioning, I believe that it's wrong in a lot of sense.

I believe a good medium is anything that bogs a person's mind, that stirrs him/her deep inside, that makes them think, feel, disturbed, alive. Nowadays I love my nightmares more than my normal happy dreams. When I wake up with sweat all over my body and my heart beating with intensity, to the dream that almost killed me, I felt moved. I felt closer to myself, closer to death, and each and every breath becomes substantial. Yeah, that's the word I'm searching for. A good medium makes you feel substantial.

I believe that this world has everything it has ever need, and in turn it's only up to us to properly use them. Not being used by them. Don't fret over "I hope we have this and that, so we can do this and that." Rather, "How can we use the things within our reach, so we can propel higher?". This way, perfection is not even questioned, it can/ will be created.

Because I do not think that perfection comes from looking back, but toward the future. In the things that we are bound to create. In the things we are bound to find, to realize, to understand, to explore. In that sense, until the end of time, we should drop perfection as we see it now. We would have no idea.

I didn't think the people of the old would think it's impossible that pictures would move and become animation. The people would never thought that big boxes would bring them places far away and certainly they would never dreamt of flying in metal cylinders with metal wings. And of course, internet. And still, what would the future bring? A big unknown. People are trying to predict what the next big thing is based on  statistics of the past, and well, Black Swan.

I'll end this seemingly short, partial artwork of mine with a profound hope for people who still seek an answer toward their suffering in life, that we are doing fine and fine and not. We are at a phase where we worry about the future too much, where we look from a very partial place we call individuality and personality, from a place called culture, from an imperfect system. And we judge too prematurely. But I guess, the future is still out there, and perfection is a fad, and it's too early to feel worried. Even if we do, it's because we haven't done all that we can from where we are, and it's imperative that we stop and look around us and see that everything's still salvageable and doable.

View everything like an artwork

I'll view my writings like my artworks. That's what I have been doing all this time. I was searching, experimenting. I don't have a set principle, that's why I was being so contradictory. I was exploring grounds I'm not familiar with. And with each discovery, my old convictions was erased, or simply said, shifted. Some of them can't be applied to some other grounds. That's it's nature. Its actually that simple.

How can I be so stupid? It's stupid to be held down by principles. It's rigid and inappropriate. Religion, dogmas and even my own 5 senses! It's stupid to think in absolutes. I'll always change according to my surroundings!

I shouldn't feel bad about being a hypocrite because I'm fleeting just like that! It's not worth trying to fixate myself to things I can't associate myself with!

Damn! This is good! I can keep being imperfect and keep exploring new grounds like this! I can keep practising my work and not be held down by associations that I should be this and that! I can be whatever I want! I can draw whatever I want however I want! I can even be rigid if I want to!

Abrupt end!